Wow. 47 days. Sam McBride, the psychologist who would not provide an out patient detox 48 days ago can go play with his lime green Dyson some more. But hey, it isn’t easy. Seriously. Sucks ass to be me at the moment. What doesn’t kill you, makes you stronger. Some idiot said that once. My own take on it was “they can’t kill me, so I’ll be back…” If you read between the lines on that one you’ll end up with severe headaches. Promise.
So here I am. Sister just died, grandma dying rapidly, mum going through some sort of a break down (who can blame her), I have asshole police being assholes… Family court took access to my daughter away as I was honest with her Mum about how my life is going at the moment. In amongst all this is jumping off methadone for 47 days now. Oh, also managed to get a fairly good dose of zopiclone withdrawal after only a week and a bit using benzo derivatives. oops, my fault. I am sure there are a couple of other crap things going on too, but I forget. Probably on purpose.
Went to court today for taking my license back from a police dickhead and driving off whilst he was supposedly saying some shit like “stop right there, you are under arrest”. Etc etc etc. Whatever. I didn’t hear him say that. He also says I drove at 75km/h. Which is garbage. There is no way he could run in front of the car at that speed. Not that I aimed at him. But seriously, dude – get the fuck out of the way. Hahahah.
So here I am. In court talking to a lawyer. One whom is actually quite good. But legal (m)aid doesn’t pay the lawyers much. It was obvious he had little, or no, time to bother with me and my trivial matters from the outset. He then asked me about some points, and I tried to reply. When I wasn’t saying what he wanted he said “Look, I don’t give a fuck about that” and then “I don’t give a fuck what you’re saying”… I stood up, reached for door handle and said “you’re fired” and walked out. He then approached me in the foyer where I told him I was not happy with being sworn at. He claims he didn’t swear. But then I said “fuck you” and he said some swear words back. So, seriously…. Told him if he ever talked to me like that again I would break his nose. He got all upset and now claims I threatened him. I don’t understand these people. They act all high and mighty, and as soon as you stand up for yourself they claim you are the problem. I am the problem because I don’t fit in your pre-conceived box. All you ass holes with these BOXES for me to fit into. Fed up with the lot of you, please fuck off and hit your own noses until they break. Save me the trouble.
Looks like I will be representing myself in this case too. Way cool. Yay, just what we need.
And now I am trying to calm down enough to present as “calm and honest” to the lawyer who has been employed by the Family Court to represent my child. I have ten minutes.
Co-incidences I don’t believe in. I just spent half an hour talking on the street with the guy whom was sitting in N.A with me last night. Good shit.
I really cannot be bothered with anything any more.
This blog is good mental health stuff. I like reading it back to myself.
Just not very often.