Seventy Six days. I would like to see my daughter…

Would really like to see my daughter. I am not the best parent in the world, but nor have I been ever given the opportunity to be. The court is now looking into “if access between [me] and my daughter meets the needs of my daughter and if contact were to resume, what form that contact would take.”


Fuck me. They wonder where I get my deep seated hatred for authority from. Go figure.


At the end of the day if being with her Dad is a negative experience / influence then that is fine. I will find it hard to walk away, but that’s what will happen. I am not as bad as the people who live next door. I am not as bad as the thousands of shitty parents you see every day doing stupid shit.

It is hard to be perfect. I would like to think I am adequate. In some ways and situations actually bloody clever. In others, not so much.

I am human after all.

And so is my damn daughter.





  1. am lucky as I get contact witrh my girls, hopefully they will be home soon. fingers crossed. I know where you are coming from, with my elder daughter I had contact 1.5 hours 3 days a week then they said she needed to bond with her grandparents, she at an age where she had to transfer her bond form to to them. Broke my heart. Now I barely get to see her. once a fortnight. Sometimes I feel it hurts to much to see her once a fortnight for an hour at a time and think it wouls be better to walk away. But if we give up the fight, they will grow up thinking we gave up on them when it got hard. KEEP THE FIGHT GOING! Someone like you, who is moving on and up with their lives, should be in their kids lives. You are a great influence. She may grow up thinking ‘daddy was in a bad place but he managed to get back up’ plz keep it up hun, it will be worth it!



      I needed to hear that… For sure. The drug addict recovery people all put it in the context of “it’s only a small blip, you are doing the right thing”.

      It is not a small blip to me at all. It is seriously the only reason I have made it to this ripe old age. Just have too much hitting head on brick walls… Need to navigate the maze that is life without constant headaches for a while.

      Is hard to be a good Dad when you’re not allowed to be. Parental bonds should not be played with like this.

      I need to pay Gabor to come over and testify!


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