No news is good news. So, here’s the news…

Hello and good morning. This bulletin is bought to you from the desk of NZFiend, recently retired opiate addict, old retired dealer, from Wellington, New Zealand. Please support todays sponsors – Ford, NZ Police and BP Ultimate 98 octane.

Heading the news this hour…

  • Land Transport Safety Authority send NZFiend a letter stating that demerit points have added up and his licence is being revoked for three months.
    Cool. Awesome. Only having got his licence back nine weeks ago, he is having it taken away for another three months. This is close to NZFiends personal best. The dates on the offences are BEFORE the last three month disqualification period started, but they only entered the system once the fines became overdue. Got us fucked. New Zealand logic at work right there.
  • Ford Falcon XR6 motor with mildly worked head, lumpy cam and after market bits for sale.
    This, truly, is news. Building this car with his own hands over a period of six or seven years, NZFiend is heartbroken. More heartbroken than being dumped twelve hours ago… By a long shot. It has been written off by insurance companies twice. The ONLY original parts on the whole car are the rear tailgate and the main body (and even that is only 80% original, rest is welded in out of other cars).  Thousands of hours have been spent on this car. Numerous skinned knuckles, one or two broken fingernails, many many cuts, bruises, swear words and the odd moment of serenity.
    There have been four other cars purchased, stripped and the good bits put into this car. It has had…

    • Automatic to manual conversion (on its third gearbox – Mustang T5z this time – and fourth clutch – 5 puk heavy duty racing system)
    • Short shifter
    • Three LSD rear diffs (blew two, third is showing signs!)
    • Complete motor build – high compression, large ports, shimmed valves, cam, really good long extractors, new coils, leads, engine computer (third) and customised programmable chip (no speed limiter, no rev limiter, tuned to run 98 octane or higher, 180 rwkw or around 250hp at the rear wheels…. Top speed, recorded, 235km/h or 150mp/h – on a race track, of course… NZFiend never did get a recorded top speed on the road…. Hahahahhahahaha.
    • Four front spring changes, two rear spring changes
    • Complete front suspension, engine mounting, steering, brake, hubs, control arms… Replaced and converted a few times.
    • Fairmont and LTD bits conversion – bonnet, lights, climate control, computerised dash, electric windows, trip computer etc etc etc
    • Four complete changes of seat, including welding brackets to fit
    • DVD head units (third one), in dash fold out DVD screens (two), cameras (three)
    • Four windscreen replacements
    • Three left hand side door replacements, two right hand side door replacements
    • Complete panels cut, welded. Other than roof and floor
    • All glass in windows replaced, along with new electric window winders and door panels…
    • Complete rust removal, bog, respray
    • Custom bits everywhere – own design phenolic spacer, own design pedal box conversion, own design firewall replacements, own design clutch cable connections (Ford ones kept snapping with the heavy duty clutches…), own design dash inserts, own design door cards, own design fuel mix ratio read out in dash, own design head unit mounting surround with cooling system for DVD and touchscreen displays, custom dash, custom instrument cluster with own graphics
    • Large throttle body, customised
    • On its third radiator (this one alloy and customised)
    • Second alternator, third fuel pump, changed fuel lines and brake lines twice as kept doing crazy 4WD tracks in the thing…
    • Uhm, that is only the start really. EVERYTHING on this whole car has been stripped, modified and replaced. Right down to the oil pump that sits in the bottom of the engine, through to moving the electric window controls from the centre console to the drivers door.

    This is a huge thing for NZFiend. Getting rid of these cars is going to be a huge change. But really, blame the Ritalin.

    No one in their right mind would have ever purchased a $1000 1994 Ford StationWagon and turned it into something that was beating turbo Toyota Supra’s down the back straight at Mansfield raceway. Especially not on a budget of a welfare cheque receiver.

    NZFiend says “luckily I was not, am arguably still not, in my right mind”.

    We agree. We are proud of the guy. He didn’t even know how to change a brake pad when he got the car. Now he strips gearboxes and rebuilds them with custom parts to suit his Falcon… He even makes a little money sometimes fixing others cars and selling home made parts he designs.

    Blame the Ritalin.

  • LIFE. It comes back and bites you on the arse.
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