Hospitals – They’ve not improved notably…

Hey there avid NZFIEND followers. Good old NZFIEND spent a few days in hospital last week. His back (spine) is very sore. Somewhat buggered actually. This condition has been getting progressively worse over two decades to the point he can no longer sit in a chair for very long, and no matter what he tells you, DO NOT EMPLOY HIM AS A BUILDER. He will return to using massive amounts of opiate pain killers just to complete the job.

Shut the hell up. You’re ruining my employment opportunities. You want me to go back to practising the finer arts of illicit drug supply chain dynamics in a real world setting rather than put nails into wood?

Dude, you are 90% idiot, 5% stubborn and too tenacious for your own good.

Yeah. And maybe if I wasn’t ADHD I would not have crashed and burnt myself to many near death experiences. It’s not the near death bit that sucks. That bit is interesting. Very enjoyable even. The tough bit is years later when you cannot stand up and walk properly. 

But everyone has a bad back NZFIEND. You are just a pussy.

Maybe so. But no, this spine is truly rooted. It is sore as all fuck. Honestly, pain is probably part of the reason why I’ve been an “opiate addict” for over twenty years. The day they invent a cure for pain, is the day I throw my drugs away.

Showed at hospital, got morphine over night… And then the doctor, without discussing things first, changed the script to Tramadol. Some would suggest Tramadol to be more problematic for addiction than morphine, but these doctors know “best”. Who am I to argue? 

Clowns to the left of me, jokers to the right, here I am – Stuck in the middle with paracetamol. 

The nurse demanded I take IBUPROFEN. She got very stroppy – ANGRY even – when I would not take it. Without my knowledge I had taken some the night before. The night nurse had given me some along with morphine instead of paracetamol. I got a very sore stomach (top of stomach seemed to cramp up) and I had to repeatedly push my emergency alarm to get a glass of milk. It was bad. Just like my old stomach ulcer feelings… Almost the same. 

GUESS WHAT YOU BLOODY IDIOTS? I have been on drugs for suspected stomach ulcers. I have liver problems. Until last month I had 13.8 million HEP C virus per 1ml of blood. And you self absorbed, self important, godlike examples of your profession, KNOW BETTER THAN ME and *DEMAND* I take DICLOFENAC or IBUPROFEN and TRAMADOL!

Christ NZFIEND. That doesn’t sound flash. I am going to look it up on WIKI… Found it…  Holy crap Batman…. How about then? Not a lot better…

Yeah? Read it and weep. I am weeping just thinking about it.

Common adverse effects include: nauseadyspepsia, gastrointestinal ulceration/bleeding, raised liver enzymesdiarrheaconstipationepistaxisheadachedizziness, rash, salt and fluid retention, and hypertension

Now, I didn’t study for ten years to become a god. Nor am I wearing the good walking shoes and brown stained shirt that would dictate I am a qualified nurse.

But I have been living in my own body for fourty years. I know Voltaren and Ibuprofen make me feel like crap. And, seriously – THE DOCTOR THEN SAYS I SHOULD TAKE OMEPRAZOLE TO COUNTER THE EFFECTS ON MY ULCER SITUATION. You medical dick heads are really pissing me off now… I am *not* taking three drugs to get a pain killing effect, then counter effect the effects of the drugs with more side effects and more drugs to counter those effects. I am even having trouble writing down what you suggested. It is not making sense, no matter how hard you try. But then the nurse said if I took the drugs she would get the doctor to come back and talk to me about it? SERIOUSLY? WHAT THE FUCK? DO YOU GUYS LIKE FILLING OUT MASSIVE AMOUNTS OF PAPERWORK WHEN PATIENTS COMPLAIN THAT YOU’VE KILLED THEM?

I – D – I – O – T – S

I am in severe pain. Which for me, is bad. It took half an hour to get out of bed. The people in the flat upstairs were at the point of ringing the police as they thought someone was being beaten up in my bedroom. It was just me swinging my legs over the side and trying to stand up. For half an hour. Sorry about that. At least the police didn’t arrive with stun guns and Glock Pistols out and demand I lie on the floor and break my foot to facilitate such a pointless activity… God bless.

 I have to stop typing. This is pissing me off even thinking about it. The last straw to break this camels back was my discharge notice —-

THERE IS NO REFERRAL TO PAIN AND SUFFERING CLINIC, NOR PHYSIOTHERAPY, NOR A FOLLOW UP WITH A REAL BACK SPECIALIST, NOR ANY MENTION OF HOW I SHOULD CARE FOR MYSELF WHEN I CANNOT EVEN LIFT A BOTTLE OF MILK – never mind carry it home from the supermarket – which I cannot walk to anyway………! I “walk” out the hospital by hanging on to the hand rail and asking people to hold lifts and doors for me. I walk out with a script for Tramadol and Paracetamol. I walk out with a


My back is stuffed, even by their dubiously one eyed capitalist standards (the MRI and X-RAYS and previous neurosurgery on my spine have proven that my spine is not five star rated, but I am not wearing a suit and tie and talking in hushed tones about share markets and shipping schedules… )

This proves their theory all along = a drug seeker and, as such, obviously I have injured my own spine on purpose to get low doses of opiate pain medications.

Say it with me.

Say it loud.

I – D – I – O – T – S


Pain killer and boredom killer…. NZFIEND style…. No need for drugs at all. Just get tattoo’s done close to your elbow. And smile and wave and make jokes with people passing by as you do so.

Is kind of true you only feel one source of pain at a time. Tattooing near elbow would not give most people feelings of calm and serenity.

Yet, there it is. Recommended by this pain addict.



Have now been sitting at computer for a few minutes straight. Remembering to get up and stretch is not all that useful. Is too sore to bother most of the time. But I needed toilet… Am doing a video to show you what standing up is like. Is sore. I kid you not. May not look it. But it is sore. With CAPITAL LETTERS. SORE!


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