!Songs & Why KimDotcom should employ me

It is actually song choice that leads to addiction.

This is a true story… Bare with… Sorry about the formattng, spelling, lack of links. I am on my 7th day of jumping off a reasonably substaintial methadone habit. It isn’t pleasant.

Kid of age eight is getting straight A’s in everything apart from the things he’s getting A+’s in. Top of his class, by a long way (his sister is the same of hers, but they are adopted so don’t start thinking whatever it is you started thinking… Bare with…)

Age eight tells the headmaster he wants to learn Z80 machine code (click here) when asked “what do you want to do next year” as part of a class held in the library for some reason. Anyway, so he tells me… He learnt to program in basic and converted bitmap graphics (binary) into HEX and DECIMAL numbers in his head to type them into a computer. He wrote a couple of simple routines to move text on a tv using commands like RET, POP A, POP B, PUSH B, INC B, SET A. Each instruction (like RET) would have a decimal number assigned to it. RET was 201 as it happens. So you type in numbers like ;

168, 56, 21, 67, 65, 127, 201

; which may or may not do anything.

  • In fact it wouldn’t. I just sat there and looked it up. It’s garbage with a RET on the end really. (read this http://www.phy.davidson.edu/fachome/dmb/py310/Z80.Instruction%20set.pdf)
    OMG – NERD JOKE. This is bloody amazing… I am always using fiend and ffff and 65536.6 (it has six six six in it) and terms like Fiery Fiends Forced Fabrication. 65536.6. Then some twat called DAN BROWN writes crap like Da Vinci code and spoils it for me. NERD JOKE, the ZILOG Z80 Machine Code Assembly Instruction Code booklet is 256 pages long. HAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHA  !end nerd joke 

He then worked out how some computer games worked and hacked them for infinite lives or what have you at age 11 or something.

This kid finally works out how to play football at 12 and starts getting a few cups for scoring most goals and whatever. He gets into an All Whites training camp a few years later too…. Doesn’t shame himself at all, his long passes and shots are amongst the best there.

He starts writing a magazine about computers and games at age 11 with two other friends who both go on to be leaders in their chosen I.T fields. He writes for the local paper every week and loans people in his class money as he gets 10cents a word and can type fast.

He finds school too easy, wins all the soccer cups. Didn’t even put up his hand to correct the form teacher when congratulating him on scoring four goals in the schools football win. He had actually scored all five in a five-four victory. The last goal was from his side of half way with less than a minute to play. He almost broke his ankle doing it as the central defender cleaned him out.

He leaves school the day he turns 16. He gets a job selling computers and earns around $40,000 including commision in the late eighties. Well, all that’s left after petrol for his motorbike is enough to have good times with his girlfriend (who is still bloody stunning at age 37 – Facebook username available on request)….

This other kid meanwhile….

This other kid is eight.

Started smoking a few years ago with his girlfriend, and continues to see the same girl (and their smoking moves onto a bit of weed) until primary school finishes at age ten.

So, this kid; smoker, addict.

He is just getting into music a bit and hears some punk and Joy Division classics. He thinks they are cool. He hasUB40 The Pillow (*lyrics at bottom) on high rotation when 11. Before that were things like Baffallo Soldier, Easy Money, Innocent Man by Billy Joel. Atmosphere gets a hiding on his Walkman. He sees an advert in a magazine from U.K. It is a punk looking guy in black and white. Very nice photography. It has words pointing at the skinny punk guy. Words say “wasted muscles”, “slow brain”, “smelly clothes”.

This young eleven year old thinks this guy looks good. He looks like he had a good night out, admittedly…

He reads the bottom.

nhs service

If anyone has a better search facility than me, they may even find the advert. That would be awesome.

Anyway, this kid goes upstairs, open the cupboard, gets a stapler out, opens up the stapler, checks it has staples, puts his wrist up over the edge of the table and slams a staple into himself.

(Thought just occured. I remember this kid telling me his Mum was a nurse and him and his sister used to play in the bath with syringes – I can just imagine how much fun squirting water would be like that. I’d not be shy of getting in a bath with that much fun myself….)

What then? Well, the kid goes to high school at 13 like everyone else. But he doesn’t take a pen or paper and acts up a lot. He gets sent out of room a lot. Get’s into a lot of fights. Breaks his best friends skull with one punch once actually. They are now friends on Facebook though. Sweet as Phil. Sorry mate.

He headbutts his other mate one time and his other mate always has a crooked smile. Even thirty years later. Sorry Geoff. Owe you one mate.

We will not bother with the tales of throwing up on the head masters legs during a maths lesson or being kicked out of exams as he had “finished” after drawing a daffy duck picture and tracing it with ticks in the multiple choice boxes (this actually earned him a B- pass in maths as it happens – just remember to only tick one box in each answer….)

So this kid grows up on a diet of Deep Purple Child in Time (his mum would always make him turn the screaming down at the end), Sex Pistols, Megadeath… Had a good thing going with Iron Maiden for a bit. Joy Division, Sisters of Mercy and other pre-emo emo!

He gets into fights and some kids dad comes and lifts him by the ear at age 12. Some do-gooder rings the police. The police come home to question the kid as they really want to get this guys dad. The kid won’t say a word. The guys dad hears about this and shouts the kid his first professional tattoo. The kid now goes and spends a lot of money on tattoo’s, finally getting sick of really awful tattoo’s at age 16. Just as he is actually allowed them.

Uhm. He is riding motorbikes fast all the time. He is late for work and the police are chasing him so he just shuts his eys at over a hundred kilomtres an hour riding down Willis St and went through two red lights. Made it to work. Boss was an old army major who chased the police out the showroom for him. He was a special kid and having the police in the showroom whilst you are selling $100,000 systems to defence force clients is somewhat tiresome. Would be nice if the bloody kid cut his hair and bought a thicker shirt to cover all those tattoo’s though. And really, getting so pissed he couldn’t walk and then riding off at full throttle from the Christmas function was a little flamboyant.

OKAY, enough of this story, it is giving me a headache. I could add another kid too.

So, there were these THREE KIDS now…..

blah blah blah (not as much blah blah blah as a boring Irvine Welsh “masterbore”, but a lot of blahs anyway)

Yeah okay, so the begginning of the story was okay. The middle was shit. I know.

Here’s the end. If you are really really really clever you would have sussed this by now….

So, these three kids. One is a complete addict after listening to music. The computer sales kid drops out for some reason at age 18. Suffering computer burn out he says. Can’t deal with computers any more he goes on a benefit. The other kid looses his girlfriend, kicks a window and ends up meeting the first two of our subjects in a dark room. Hollywood style……………

Yes, the three kids are the same kid.




UB40 The Pillow Lyrics

A smile for every passing car
And when they stop with door ajar
She shrugs and whispers, “Que sera”
And turns her thoughts to the pillow
Her face is etched with memories
She finds now joy amid the sleaze
It’s hard when you’ve been paid to please
So she turns her head to the pillow

Daylight comes, she rests her head
The beauty of an empty bed
She dreams of happy days
Instead of brooding on tomorrow

She swapped her dreams of shining knights
For pushers, bars and money fights
For nameless faces in red light
So she turns her head to the pillow

Those black eyes, they don’t hurt any more
She’s heard the jokes and jibes before
She’s felt the long arm of the law
So she turns her head to the pillow

Daylight comes, she rests her head
The beauty of an empty bed
She dreams of happy days
Instead of brooding on tomorrow

Taking drugs was not for fun
It made her feel like going on
And now she hurts when it’s all gone
And she turns her face to the pillow
She takes a blade and breaks her skin
Sweet life’s force flows from within
The white clouds in her head grow dim
And she turns her face to the pillow

Sunlight creeps across her head
Pale beauty in a crimson bed
No dreams of happy days ahead
She’ll have no more tomorrows


http://www.nzonscreen.com/title/adults-and-children-1981 The Gordons, NZ Band


http://www.nzonscreen.com/title/buddy-1988 Snapper, NZ Band


http://www.nzonscreen.com/title/splat-1995 BailterSpace, NZ Band


http://www.nzonscreen.com/title/blowin-dirt-2001 GoodShirt, NZ Band

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